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Subject: History Facts
Date: Sun, 3 Apr 2005 13:07:24 EDT
" William the Conqueror was an impressive figure at the turn of the last
millennium, a fearsome warrior whose life seemed to be one spectacular triumph
after another. He defied the taint of illegitimacy at an early age, back when
they still called him William the Bastard, to become Duke of Normandy. Out
maneuvering dangerous relatives, subduing restless nobles, and checking the
territorial ambitions of neighbouring states, Duke William consolidated his
power and then set his sights on Britain. There he easily defeated the English
King Harold at the Battle of Hastings in 1066 and became the first of a long
line of monarchs who have ruled Britain ever since. But two decades later he
died, and things didn't go so well after that.
With his last breath in 1087, the once awesome ruler was instantly
transformed into a bloated corpse destined for a series of indignities he could never
have imagined during his lifetime. Actually, the humiliation began shortly
before William expired, with the wound that killed him. While fighting in
France, the warrior king was felled not by an enemy's ax or sword, but by his own
saddle, gouged on its horn when his horse reared at a burning ruin. History
does not record exactly where on his person William ruptured. One can only
imagine.
The stricken king was taken by his retainers to the priory of Saint Gervais,
where he died several days later. With their sovereign dead, Williams loyal
companions immediately raced off to secure their own interests, leaving the
body alone with the servants. William the Conqueror was now ripe for the
picking. Seizing the opportunity, the greedy staff started hauling away all his
possessions, even his clothes, and the dead king was left on the floor nearly
naked.
The Norman chronicler Ordericus Vitalis recorded the whole ghastly episode a
generation later: " Behold this mighty prince who was lately obsequiously
obeyed by more than a hundred thousand men in arms, and at whose nod nations
trembled, was now stripped by his own attendants, in a house which was not his
own, and left on the bare ground from early morn to almost noon."
And yet the ordeal wasn't over. Eventually King Williams body was collected
by a group of monks and given a funeral. When it came time to place the corpse
in its coffin, however, the gathered were stunned to find it didn't quite
fit.William had to be crammed in. He had grown a bit obese after his glory
days, so this was difficult. Suddenly the church was filled with a horrible
stench.Ordericus Vitalis concludes the story: " His corpulent stomach, fattened
with so many delicacies, shamefully burst, to give a lesson, both to the
prudent and the thoughtless, on what is the end of fleshy glory."
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