NYNIAGAR-FOLKS-L ArchivesArchiver > NYNIAGAR-FOLKS > 2008-07 > 1216912645
Subject: Re: [NYNIAGAR-FOLKS] Genealogy - humorous tongue in cheek piece
Date: Thu, 24 Jul 2008 11:17:25 -0400
I know of a few of those people. Some of them are my ancestors. I always wondered why I couldn't find them :-)
Thanks Evelyn. I enjoy fun notes.
From: Evelyn Cooper <>
Sent: Thu, 24 Jul 2008 7:56 am
Subject: [NYNIAGAR-FOLKS] Genealogy - humorous tongue in cheek piece
WERE YOUR ANCESTORS BEAMED DOWN BY ALIENS? NEW DNA EVIDENCE.
Scientists at The National Academy for the Study of UFO's have recently
confirmed the existence of the "UFO chromosome." While most genealogists are
aware of the x chromosome, passed from one female generation to the next, and
the y chromosome, from which it is possible to determine descent in an
uninterrupted male lineage from a common ancestor, the "UFO chromosome" had
previously been only speculation. Working with DNA recovered from the aliens
of the Roswell, New Mexico crash, the scientists have discovered the "UFO
chromosome" is also present in some humans. This discovery confirms that
aliens have been breeding with humans for centuries, and beaming their progeny
back to earth.
For the "low" price of $10,000, they will test your DNA to see if you possess
the "UFO chromosome." While the test will not tell WHICH ancestor had the "UFO
chromosome," there are several ways to identify that ancestor. For those
ancestors to conceal their identity:
1. They moved every few years, never spending long at one location.
2. They were the only person of that surname in the county.
3. The county clerk who was also an alien, assured that your ancestor's
marriage bond would "accidentally" be lost, their deeds set aside and never
recorded, and their entire probate file would turn up "missing" even though
indexes say it once existed.
4. The census taker would either not list them, OR he would list them twice,
with sleight differences, causing quarrels among descendants whether they are
the same person or not.
5. The family Bible was sent "west" with the youngest unmarried daughter,
where she married a "Mr. Smith."
6. The family cemetery was sold to outsiders, who used the headstones to make
7. The church they joined did not believe in recording vital statistics.
8. They started rumors of how they were related to someone famous, causing
descendants to search the wrong family.
9. They started rumors of how they were born in England, arrived in Virginia
with two brothers (one of whom was born in France, the other in Sweden). To
conceal their identity, one brother moved to Georgia, the other to Maine, while
they remained in Virginia.
10. And, when all else failed and they were about to be discovered, the county
court house would "accidentally" burn.
If you can prove your ancestor was beamed down by aliens, Halbert's of Bath,
Ohio has recently prepared a family history of the Alien family, complete with
the Alien coat of arms, which you will be proud to display over your fireplace.
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