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Archiver > ESSEX-UK > 2004-09 > 1094124736


From: "Sarah Fegredo" <>
Subject: Re: Essex family problems - to disclose or not?
Date: Thu, 2 Sep 2004 12:32:16 +0100
References: <016601c48ffc$3eec4a60$a8790650@packard>


My two pennorth is that families and family secrets are very strange things
and that what once might have been considered a disgrace now isn't, and also
that the sense of an unusual circumstance tainting the whole family has now
much reduce, for example, if a person was in a lunatic asylum the whole
family kept quiet for fear they would be "tarred with the same brush"
whereas now we would be sympathetic that they had a relative who was
mentally ill, and hopefully offer friendship and support. My own example
relates to that of race: when I started researching my husband's strange
surname there was some talk of India, and a range of documents from India,
but mostly the talk was of Spanish sea captains and other such romantic
tales. The reality is much more prosaic - the Fegredos are Anglo-Indian,
i.e. the result of relationships between portuguese traders and "native"
women. They are therefore technically of mixed blood, indeed my husband
technically qualifies for an Indian passport. My father in law looked
slightly uneasy when I raised this with him but didn't react negatively. My
conclusion is that he picked up, as children do, the family "thing" that one
does not discuss race and skin colour issues because one might get on sticky
ground! Any comment on the name could be headed of by vague assertions
about Spanish sea captains - after all dark skinned europeans were more
acceptable than "half caste" Indians. Needless to say that in more
enlightened times the family just takes the issue in their strides and
enjoys having something a bit out of the ordinary in the family tree.

Sarah Fegredo
Nottingham UK
----- Original Message -----
From: "colleen morrison" <>
To: <>
Sent: Wednesday, September 01, 2004 9:18 AM
Subject: Essex family problems - to disclose or not?


> From time to time I help with a query and discover something in the past
> regarding an enquirer's direct line of ancestors that might upset the
> enquirer if I tell them. I don't mean murderers, murder victims, out of
> wedlock births or that sort of thing, many of us have those and don't bat
> an eyelid about this or even welcome the colour it gives our research.

etc.

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